Thursday

17

July 2014

I’m Losing My Marbles

Don't let your marbles fall., Kerplunk

Self-doubt is a pretty sneaky bastard. It creeps up on you when you’re not looking, eases its way into your mind, and steals any confidence you have, turning your life into a giant game of Kerplunk. As each rod of confidence is removed, more pieces of your life tumble down until you’ve lost all your marbles. Before you know it, you’re standing there with a pile of insecurities, baffled at how you got there, and questioning every move, much like a drunken one night stand. Not that I know what that’s like.

Well, it looks like self-doubt has managed to ninja its way into my life. For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been standing here with my insecurities in hand questioning the quality of this blog and my writing.

self-doubt, creativity

Is it any good? Is this what I wanted my blog to be? How can I make it better? How can I improve my writing? Am I even a good writer?

These are just a few of the questions that have been circling my brain and paralyzing me with doubt. It got so bad that I questioned every word I typed, every blog topic I brainstormed, and every photo I edited. I questioned whether I had truly found my voice or was just mimicking the faint echos of those around me.

Afraid that I was losing all my marbles, I took an unplanned blog vacation to hunt down my answers. At one point during my search, in between conversations of thigh gaps and hot celebrities, I let it slip to my bestie that I had been plagued by doubt. To which she offered me these wonderful pearls of wisdom:

.

“If even one person enjoys it, you’re doing fine.”

“Fuck it. Just get to where YOU like it.”

 .

Well, these are both great ideas, but what happens if you never reach that point?

You see, I have always been my worst critic. I hold myself to a much higher standard than I hold other people. And I hold my writing to an even higher standard than that! It’s quite a predicament when you can’t even reach your own standards. It might also mean that those standards are impossible for anyone to achieve.

So how do you get out of your own way? This is a question I’m still struggling to answer, but I’m slowly realizing that remaining paralyzed by my own self-doubt will only cause me to lose my marbles faster than Tootles from Peter Pan. I may not be the best writer and I may not have the best blog, but all I can do is try. I can try to improve my writing. I can try to steer my blog in the direction that I want it to go. And I can try to overcome my crippling self-doubt.

In a world where everything and everyone is already telling us we’re not good enough, the last thing we need is to to tell ourselves that, too. So, for now, I am choosing to believe in myself. I hope all of you will, too.

Have you ever experienced crippling self-doubt? How did you deal with it?

Friday

04

July 2014

The Pursuit of Happiness

pursuit-of-happiness, independence day

Today is Independence Day in America – a day for fireworks, barbecue, chugging beer and remembering all the rights that we are lucky to possess. Life. Liberty. And the pursuit of Happiness.

Well, today I want to focus on a few pursuits that I hope will one day be included in our ‘inalienable rights.’

We have the right to pursue happiness…

In the arms of the person we love, no matter our/their race, religion, sex, gender and sexual orientation.

Through self love, no matter our size or shape.

By remaining young at heart. Forget about being too old for something. Just live your life.

In the arms of our favorite sweet treat without feeling guilty. So bring on the chocolate!

In bed without being shamed for it. What goes on between our sheets (and out of them) is nobody’s business but our own.

With or without children in our lives. It is our choice.

While rocking that sexy little outfit or flannel pajamas. Our bodies. Our rules.

By following our dreams, whether that be blazing to the top of the corporate ladder, jet setting around the world or popping out 6 kids for your own Brady Bunch family.

Without judgment. Our lives are ours to live how we see fit. Our decisions may not coincide with other people’s beliefs or choices, but they do not have to live our lives. At the end of the day, we are the only ones who have to like our decisions.

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY, AMERICA!

How do you pursue happiness? Should anything be added to this list?

Wednesday

25

June 2014

The ‘F’ Word: Feminism

Feminists – bra burning, man-haters or advocates for political and social equality?

Feminism, Feminist

In the past, many women proudly hailed to the feminist cause wearing the label like a badge of honor. It was the strength, courage and determination of these feminists that yielded women many basic rights that they had been previously denied, such as the right to vote.

Sadly, feminism, once a great and worthy cause, has evolved into a dirty word that many women avoid like the plague. The dreaded ‘F’ word has become synonymous with the idea of man-hating women who want to usurp power from men. In fact, the stereotypes that have taken hold are so pervasive within our culture that many women, who’s beliefs may be fundamentally feminist, are too afraid to call themselves feminists.

Even celebrities have been trying to distance themselves from the ‘F’ word:

“No, because I love men, and I think the idea of ‘raise women to power, take the men away from the power’ is never going to work out because you need balance.”

- Shailene Woodley

“I’m not a feminist. I hail men, I love men, I celebrate American male culture — beer, bars, and muscle cars.” 

- Lady Gaga

Note: She later told the LA Times that she is a “little bit of a feminist.”

Despite the misguided and stereotypical views of feminism, I have a confession to make. I. Am. A. Feminist.

No, I do not hate men, burn my bra, refuse to shave my legs or hail as a queen bitch. Though I am often too lazy to shave my legs, and am quite capable of invoking my bitchiness, that has nothing to do with feminism.

By definition, feminism is ‘the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities.’

It does not mean that we believe women are better than men or deserve more than men. It simply means that we believe in equality – equal pay, equal rights, equal opportunities. How can that be a negative thing?

Feminist, What is feminism

Okay, yes. There are some feminists who also happen to be misandrists, people who hate men. However, misandry and feminism are two different beliefs. In actuality, many feminists love men or are men. And we welcome feminist men in our ranks and love feminist men in our lives.

So while you do not have to identify as feminist or agree with feminism, you should not fear it. It is not a dirty word to be kept out of your vocabulary or distanced from your identity. It is a belief grounded in the fact that we are all human, worthy of the same rights and opportunities.

Some may think feminism is no longer needed. Women have the right to vote. They have the right to an education. And they are no longer expected to simply be housewives. They have a choice.

But there are still fewer women in positions of power. There is still a gap in wages earned by men and women who hold the same position. And there are still women across the globe who are striving to reach the level of autonomy that we have in our society. Women who are married off at young ages. Women who are denied education. Women who are shunned or tortured for rejecting marriage proposals. Women who need feminism.

So don’t fear the ‘F’ word. Embrace it. If you are a feminist, let your feminist flag fly high with honor and pride. I know I will.

What is feminism to you? Do you consider yourself a feminist?

Vodka and Soda
The Hump Day Blog Hop

Friday

20

June 2014

Lazy Days Are Here Again

 Friday Favorites

It’s about time that my unplanned blogging hiatus come to an end. Although, a week of relaxation after traveling for concerts, preparing for company, hosting the boy’s parents for a week and celebrating the boy’s birthday was just what the doctor ordered. And by doctor I mean me and my laziness.

Last week, I spent my days getting up at the crack of dawn for work, playing tour guide during the afternoons and enjoying an endless amount of card games at night. By the end of the day, I could barely keep my eyes open and was basically falling into bed at night. One night I unexpectedly passed out at 8:30 PM. When did I become such a grandma?!

My narcoleptic tendencies aside, it was a very tiring, but fun week.

So let’s take a look at some of my favorite moments from my mini blog vacation:

Troy’s Birthday.

Troy and I spent his birthday enjoying our alone time together. After a week of spending time with his family and mine it was much needed. We enjoyed lunch at a new restaurant, a quick browse through the bookstore, spending some of his birthday money on his truck, catching a movie and snuggling up on the couch that night. All in all a very good day indeed.

Homemade Breakfasts.

This was a definite perk of having Troy’s parents here for a week. Most days I had a hot homemade breakfast waiting for me when I finished work in the morning. I loved the fresh aroma of bacon wafting into my office as I closed up shop for the day. Do you think I could convince Troy to make me breakfast before he leaves for work in the mornings?

Bacon, Breakfasts

Botanical Gardens.

Troy and I have been to the gardens before for their movie in the garden series, but we had never looked around. So a visit from his parents was the perfect excuse for a stroll through the garden. The sun was fairly hot, but the garden was beautiful.

Joining a Book Club.

I’m so excited to be joining a few of my friends for a book club. Books. Friends. Wine. Food. Yes, please!

Book club can drink, book club

Book club, wine

Unexpected trips.

Troy has a last minute unexpected errand to run in Austin today, so we’ve decided to make a day of it. I love visiting my old stomping grounds!

Bridesmaids

What are your weekend plans? And what are some of your favorite moments from this week?

Monday

09

June 2014

The Boys Are Back in Town

That time I pretended to be a teenager again.

BSB in Houston

As most of you know, last week I attempted to relive my youth in the 6th row at a Backstreet Boys concert. And you know what’s better than attending a concert as a teenager? Attending one as an adult … with alcohol! Youth: 0. Adulthood: 1.  It was then that I realized this growing older thing may not be so bad after all.

Backstreet Boys Concert

Obviously, I am not the only one who was attempting to recapture the glory of my youth. My voice was merely one in a sea of screaming women (and some men) who were eager to see the Boys shake what their mama’s gave them. And shake it they did! After all these years, the Backstreet Boys can still drop it like it’s hot with just as much energy and enthusiasm as when they first filled our teen dreams.

However, the audience was also filled with many poor husbands and boyfriends who were dragged to the concerts by their eager women. And I’m pretty sure they didn’t appreciate the Boys shaking their groove things. Many just sat in their seats patiently awaiting the end of the concert. Poor fellas definitely earned some brownie points that night. Even stranger, were the older couples who seemed so out of place among the screaming women. I guess everybody loves the Boys!

And now for some of my favorite pictures of the night:

Backstreet Boys Concert 2014

BSB Concert 2014

Backstreet Boys at Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion

Backstreet Boys Concert 2014
Backstreet Boys Concert Houston
AJ Mclean, BSB Concert Houston

Backstreet Boys Concert in Houston 2014

BSB, Backstreet Boys

Check out the pictures from last year’s Backstreet Boys concert here.

What is the boy band of your dreams? And what has been your favorite concert?

 

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