More Things My Students Say

teacher, students, English Phone Teacher

Teaching English to people on the other side of the world means that I’m up before the crack of dawn every day, so it’s a good thing that my students are so entertaining. I can always count on them for a good laugh and a few compliments.

Here are a few of the gems I’ve picked up during my lessons:

They have impressive insights into life:

“I heard that Americans marry 3 times. The first time in their 20s for love. The second in their 30s for money. And again in 60s for no reason.”

“Everything is important in the universe. Mankind and not”

“First of all, my wife is very beautiful. I just husband. I worship my wife.”

I guess I’m running a little behind on that first marriage. I’ve got one year to get it done! Then I’ve got to start looking for that sugar daddy for my 30s. Any takers?

They can also be extremely honest:

“I am very fat man. Not Batman. Fat man.”

“I really want to hear your voice, but not now.”

Me: “Do you get along with your sister in-law?”
Student: “She’s beautiful. Unfortunately, she was married. I’m very envy about that.”

Me: “How do you clean your laundry at home?”
Student: “ I ask my wife.”

Me: “What kind of goals do you have for your future?”
Student: “Actually, I want to be tall.”

Me: “How would you describe your appearance?”
Student: “Well … handsome.”

Some are very conservative:

“I’m not Taliban, but I think woman should keep in their house.”

“I don’t like woman to work outside home. I think that is more appropriate role for woman.”

Poor guys were definitely preaching to the wrong woman. Luckily, I’m able to keep my opinions to myself during work.

But they really know how to flatter a girl:

“I love your voice very much. I love Texas girl.”

“I want to deliver your breakfast, but I can’t do that.”

“Your voice is good. Your personality is good I think.”

“Your voice is so young and beautiful and kind. Your sound when you’re smiling is very nice.”

Student: “I’m 51. How old you?”
Me: “I’m 28.”
Student: “Ooooh! Nice!”

Someone wants to deliver my breakfast? Yes, please! I’m always willing to let people bring me free food.

Of course, they’re also very concerned with my personal life:

“How about we just free talking? How about we talk about you?”

“In Korea, that is marriage age. Your age is old girl.”

One thing is for sure, my job is not boring! If you’d like to learn more about being a Phone English Teacher, click here. Or head on over and check out some more pearls of wisdom from my students.

  • Jaelan | Making Mrs. M

    What an interesting job!

    This post made me laugh so hard. People say the funniest things. It’s amazing what some distance does, isn’t it? People are pretty much the same, but so different at the same time.

    I have a friend in China right now teaching English. I’m sending her here to read this!

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      Oh, I’ve definitely learned a lot about Korean culture! :) It’s interesting to see all the cultural differences, as well as the similarities. I hope your friend can also appreciate this post. I’d love to hear some of her stories too. :)

  • Kristen

    omg laughing so hard; not batman. haha. man i hope i only marry once, but i guess i’m not american, phew!

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      Haha. I guess you’re saved from all those marriages! Man, it’s a good thing the 2nd one is for money. Three weddings would be crazy expensive!

  • Pamela of

    I’m dying! My fav was:

    Me: “What kind of goals do you have for your future?”
    Student: “Actually, I want to be tall.”

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      That was one of my teenage students. She’s too funny. :)

  • Mary-Keith Piasecki

    bahaha! These are hilarious! Your job sounds super interesting! I think that “very fatman” is the best haha

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      My job keeps me entertained that’s for sure! My students are all really interesting people. :)

  • Tricia’s Mostly Healthy Life

    This is soooo funny! I would def have to bite my tongue, hold my breath – and probably hang up if someone told me women should stay at home!

    It cracks me up about the ratio of marriages. In some cases I would say it is true. I have never been married and it is too late to marry for love so I guess I gotta marry for money! Thankfully, I am in a relationship and we love each other so I will pretend I am in my 20s then.

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      Oh, I’ve definitely had to learn to keep my opinions to myself! Some days it’s harder than others. Hah. :)

      As for the marriages, we’ll just say y’all are 22. :) Or that you’re trying to combine love and money!

  • Ashley

    Now the Fatman/Batman one got me cracking up!

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      :) My students are definitely comedians in their own right!

  • Ashley

    Fatman/Batman one got me cracking up! Now the Fatman/Batman one got me cracking up!

  • Andrea @ The Pineapple Cake

    I loved reading this, and i love how you wrote it exactly as your students said it. Is it weird I gave them an accent in my head?
    “Me: “How do you clean your laundry at home?”
    Student: “ I ask my wife.”” — this was hilarious. I can imagine some of the guys I know say this as well. :)

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      Haha. I love that you gave them an accent! :) Some of them have really good American accents though. They just haven’t quite mastered the language yet. And I know plenty of guy who would love to ask their wife to do their laundry. LOL.

  • Ash @ The Nashvillian

    I love the one about the laundry – too funny!

    • Eternally WanderLyn

      At least, he was honest about it! Haha. :)