The Birthday Curse

Birthday curse, Sad birthday, Leslie Gore

Hi. My name is Lynsey and I have a birthday curse.

In my previous post,  Halloween, Sugar Comas, & My Birthday, I shared the tales of my awesome slutty costumes, but what I didn’t mention were all the disappointments. Each year I make amazing plans. And each year the curse sneaks up on me, ruins my plans, and then points and laughs. Basically, the curse is Nelson from The Simpsons.

The Simpsons, Birthday curse

Year 19

This was my freshman year of college, my first year away from home, and the first year I planned to party the night away on 6th Street  in Austin, TX. Well, this was also the first year the curse would strike!

My boyfriend of the time was in town visiting, a killer outfit had been carefully selected, and we joined my parents for dinner, who were in town for my birthday. Things were going great and I was super excited for a night of dancing with my friends. Then the curse reared its yellow head! My car decided it was the perfect time to throw a tantrum. Instead of shaking my groove thing down on 6th Street, I spent the night doing my best Sleeping Beauty impression on the floor of my sister’s apartment, while the boyfriend and my father dealt with the tantrum.

Year 20

This was the year I was finally going to make it to 6th to celebrate my birthday in style! Wrong. Again, my temperamental car would decide that this was not the year for me to show off my dance moves. The day of my birthday my passenger side window refused to roll up leaving me with no ride to Austin. Apparently, my car is as stubborn as I am. Or maybe it was trying to tell me that my dance moves are just that bad.

A couple of nights later, I did finally make it down to Austin for a very fun Halloween, but the night of my birthday was spent sitting at home in front of my computer screen. Birthday of champions, people!

Year 21

Now this is definitely the year you’re supposed to party it up like an animal, right? Well, I think I might have chosen the wrong animal. At the time, I was dating a wounded soldier, who couldn’t stand for long periods of time and couldn’t drink because of his meds. He tried to make it up to me by taking me to the movies and watching me have a couple of drinks at the pool hall. It was sweet, but not exactly my ideal birthday celebration.

Year 23

Year 23 was the year I FINALLY got to celebrate my birthday on 6th Street! In costume no less! However, we got there so late that we only had a chance to down a couple of drinks. Then when it came time to leave the Army boyfriend, who had dropped us off, was MIA. I was so mad at being stranded on 6th Street with no car and he heard about it the next morning when I finally made it home. Even so, I think that we had more fun on our journey to my friend’s apartment than we did in the club. Go figure.

Year 24

I had high hopes for this birthday since I would be spending it in Ireland! I flew into Ireland on my birthday ready for some good ole Irish fun, but my friends were not so ready. They were in bed by 9 PM and I was left sitting in the hall of our hostel trying to get phone reception. Apparently, curses have a passport too.

I had better hopes for our Halloween adventure in Londonderry, where the celebration overflowed from the pubs into the streets. It was amazing! But in true Lynsey fashion something had to go wrong. My friends and I were separated and spent the night wandering the streets trying to find each other. It was like a giant live action game of ‘Where’s Waldo”.  Oh, well. At least, I was in Ireland.

Year 25 & 26

Nelson, the curse, must have taken a long holiday because years 25 & 26 were actually pretty amazing! I danced. I laughed. My friend cried (it’s what she does when she’s drunk). These were definitely ones for the books!

Year 27

I was still the new kid in town and didn’t have very many friends nearby, so my boyfriend and I spent a low key night together.

Year 28

That brings us to this year – the year the curse returned with a vengeance. The plan was to celebrate with my boyfriend and friends on Halloween in Austin. I used my one flex-day at work to get the day off. I booked a hotel downtown so that both my boyfriend and I could booze it up, which we’ve never been able to do before (someone has to drive). I spent countless hours hunting down everything needed to make our stellar costumes. And Troy, the boyfriend, spent weeks trying to find someone to cover his shift at work, settling instead for switching shifts with someone so that he could get off at 6 PM instead of 8 PM.

Then the week before my birthday the curse slowly started creeping up when I received the first cancellation text. By my birthday, everyone of my friends had cancelled on me. I was beginning to doubt whether the show would go on. And last night I got my answer.

Both the night of my birthday and Halloween, I sat home alone, all dressed up with no where to go. Despite my hopes to have a nice dinner on my birthday, Troy didn’t get home from work until almost 1 AM making Halloween my last hope for a birthday celebration. I mean not even Nelson can be that cruel, right?

Come Halloween night Troy was also no where to be found. He got sent on a call to Houston and we had to cancel our trip because he wasn’t going to make it back in time. Funny thing is, his partner and the woman he switched shifts with got off earlier than usual. It’s a shame that we didn’t get to show off our kick-ass costumes!

The Joker Costume, Harley Quiin Costume, The Joker and Harley Quinn

I’ve got this crazy look down!

I’m beginning to think that in order to outwit my birthday curse I should celebrate at sporadic times throughout the year. Maybe I’ll begin celebrating my unbirthdays instead! What do you guys think?

Have you had a birthday that bombed? Or do you have a similar birthday curse? Tell me all about it in the comments!

  • Lauren Gardner

    I find this hilarious (& sad!) because I feel the same way. Birthdays can get pretty lame pretty fast – sort of overrated. Sigh. My birthday is this month so I suppose we’ll see if I make it to Sixth Street! If I do, I’ll celebrate for the both of us :)

    • Eternally WanderLyn


      They are kind of overrated and super hyped up. Even so, I hope that your birthday is filled with all kinds of awesomness! If you do head down to 6th on your birthday, show the bartenders your ID and claim your free b-day shots! Make sure to have one for me. 😀 And Happy Early Birthday!